ClaireSim♥

somehow, i really wish that i can turn my back on my past and move on rather than staying there and getting hurt..

i finally found out, that i have not got over what had happened to me in the past.

headache, backache. gosh. enough of all these larhh!

feeling quite empty still, since the ruanxian concert is over. ohh well. saturday is the last day of 2011 alr.. time really flies. thinking back to what actually happened this year.. its really a pain. from the first day of sec 4.. to mid year.. to prelims.. o level... then SYCO audition, kaoji, ruanxian concert.. hahas, really a busy year.

hmm.. talking about SYCO. i'm shortlisted. :D hahas, quite happy. hmm, but orientation's on the 11 Jan.. which means i'm gonna miss my class bbq. ):

hmm. class bbq. 4e2. thinking back, i also spent my 2 years with this class. from 3e2 to 4e2, though there unhappiness, its kind of fun. form class days... LOL. but to me, it seems like a nightmare. secondary school life.. memorable but sad. sometimes, its better to just let it go.. and that'll be something that i need to learn.

i still remember the day i first step into Damai Sceondary School.. the horror of entering into a new environment.. new friends.. and leaving the comfortable environment of the 6 years in Maha Bodhi.. knowing that all of us are going to new schools.. hmm. being enlisted in 1e5.. and all the sadness in sec 1.. entering the P and VP office due to a project (yarh yarh, cause of Qi Fang!) being left out for half a year.. and finally being found out innocent.. that's a bunch of crap now.. shows me how the world will be like.. even though its true that the world outside has worst people than her.. ohh well.

sec 2e5.. hais. i still remember the stupid things that happened too. that's when i know Yu Fong.. hmm.. and i guess that starts everything.. all the troubles between me and Zhao Hua.. but that's the past.. at least not anymore. :/

going into sec 3.. leaving 2e5 and into 3e2.. knowing new friends.. and being betrayed even by my closest friend.. hais.. sad life.

sec 4.. hectic life. busy with studies. mid year... prelims.. then o levels. hahas. on top of that.. have ruanxian rehearsals.. SY auditions.. kaoji.. but all starts well and ends well. (: tiring though..

time really flies.. hais.. time to let go of the past.. well, 2011 is coming to an end.. and i really wish it takes these away too... time to emo.

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finally! i survived the very very busy week! :D

hmm, performance is over. everything done. nth to worry alr.

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i don't see a point in all this nonsense.

i'm really confused. i really am.

so, a whole day of practice. its really very tiring. ):
hmm, now a days.. no habit of sleeping early.. and my habit of waking up early is still there. hahahas!

so, there's practice for the next few days til sunday. hope that i can really cope with this busy week!

And I remember all those crazy things you said You left them running through my head You're always there, you're everywhere But right now I wish you were here. All those crazy things we did Didn't think about it, just went with it You're always there, you're everywhere But right now I wish you were here

practice today. tired to the max. caught up on some sleep at granny's. at least better then none. but i wish i weren't so disappointed and confused still...

我努力想起你笑着哭泣让自己深爱你再学会放弃我不想忘记你就算可以我宁可记得所有伤心我努力想起你苦也没关系用祝福和感激勇敢失去你爱你这个决定虽然艰辛我不说对不起

it hasn't been any better for me.

kaoji ytd.. received the news of a merit. at least its better than a just passed or a fail. shouldn't expect that much. learning zhong ruan.. an interest. doing my best should be the best of anything. results meant nth. putting in effort is the best. however.. thinking back.. what used to happen because of a result.. hais.. it ain't sth i liked to think of.

not enough sleep.. eyebags came out.. and mum complaining about it.. as if i could do anything? plus.. i couldn't get sufficient rest at all.. hais. unrest is settling in now. i couldn't think properly. i'm feeling the emptiness, sadness and confusion now. like bad mood can lift up the mood?! but ohh well... feeling tired is becoming an excuse for a rest.. and i have to carry on doing my things. it's not gonna help just by feeling tired...

i wish that i can put these aside. its starting to irritate myself. enough of these...

Labels: emptiness.

practice practice and more practice! audition, exam, performance!

busy month.. and 5 more days to my birthday. its so freaking fast! D:

back to emoing. things never change do they? sometimes it just tires me out before i can do anything. im tired seriously. one thing after another. i really need a breather. hais.