ClaireSim♥

honestly, i'm kind of tired. very tired. i think i'm gonna have to go MIA seriously..
i really really hate myself.

had swimming in the morning. was tired due to no mood and the previous night. home-d and had tuition. then went for a nap. hais. i sleep then 5 min wake up le. sleep, wake up, sleep, wake up. dunno larh.

tmr no more cca. was kind of happy but still, hais. currently waiting for Fong to reply my msg.

6 days to GUZHENG EXAM!

tag replies.
Cheresa: hello. (:

Firstly, Guzheng exam is relly 1 week away. its 7 days more.
secondly, i dun have the mood.
thirdly, i hate myself and i suck.
---

well, kind of bored.

had tuition in the morning and then learnt the keyboard. after that ate lunch did homework and learnt guzheng. hell lots of things to do. after all that, i knid of felt tired. for the first time from learning guzheng. hais, dunno what to do le. so, i'm back to blog.

i'm thinking of MIA-ing again, since end of cca and the next time i see my friends will be the 091209 and birthday on 061209. i won't be celebrating this year, sorry to disappoint someone. its purely out of no mood. i just couldn't bring up the mood...

its now only 5++ going to 6pm and is alr so dark. that made my mood worst. i haven been able to bring it up since the start of cca. though i was quite happy on the outside. and plus, i didn't answer much. the stupid teacher oso contributed to the worst. she is just a terrible person who dun understand people other than herself and she just suck.

hais, 1 week. really 1 week to exams and i couldn't figure out any techniques to improve. i'm really in dead condition now. if i dun firgure it out by tmr, i'm dead.

i really want to forget everything. holding on to one thing is seriously very difficult and i hate it. if i could forget at least one thing, i would be happy alr.

i have no mood to post anymore.

7 days to guzheng exam.

no more sch! YAY~
--

went to bugis after keyboard, then home-d. kidda bored. i have nth to do.

8 days to guzheng exam.

i really wish that i could get what i should.

can i give up on what i dun wan? hais.

i'm tired, really tired. stop it.

ohh, i'm tired. just can't help it anymore. i hate acting happy.
--

i'm quite pissed off today. guzheng teach new song, and i learnt it before. wtf. then de teacher dunno, think i what, play so fast, not fast at all lorh, just only cause i can play it and her students can't! WTF!

after that took bus home. reach home then raining. feel like going into the big rain and sit there emo. still got lightning then fun.

9 days to guzheng exam.

i'm tired. tmr is keyboard and theory. i oso injured my thumb again...

tag replies.
Jinsoon: err, okay...

today have guzheng. went to sch myself. suprised that it took 30 mins only.
then went to CS after guzheng to meet mummy, but was very tired. den home-d.. on de bus suddenly Mei Fang msg me. at first thought who sia. LOL.
i'm now freaking tired.
--

i'm worried of next year. bio history and higher chinese..

10 days to guzheng exam!

tag replies.
Jinsoon: ...

well, offically 100th post.
--

went guzheng-ed today. didn't have wait for kaili long. 2mins after me she reached sch.
after guzheng, home-d. guzheng lesson at night was changed to today 8pm. hais, sianx.
home-d, took money from mummy and chiong-ed back to sch to buy books. ahh, damn heavy. called daddy to come fetch me. after that kean called me. LOL.
ahh, then daddy came~ sad. he came in a bad mood. dunno what happened. then he came home in good mood. LOL?! went marine parade to eat. then i did the cross stich! so long never do, but at least quite fast le. finished one alr. (:

see, nice? {hahahs} staggitarius~

i'm kind of bored. at home, in sch, always bored. i'm now waiting for guzheng exam to arrive. then, YAY! end of guzheng education.

11 days to exam!

tag replies.
Jinsoon: hahas, its okay. thx for tagging.
lezhu: yeaa yeaa. LOL.

today streaming results are out. i went 3e2 (: with Arini and same class as Kaili. WOOTS <3
--

guzheng-ed, then after that went canteen to hand in money to Aaron.
after that go to the GO to collect booklist, and accompanied Judith to bedok inter and took 25 to ang mo kio. went to the flower farm today, den post the pics.

--
To Boon Kang.H, Yew Ron.N, Kean.T, Kaibin.T,Arini:
Though we are seperating to different classes, we are still friends always okay? you all are always my best friends and pls, dun forget each other! if we are having the same recess next year, we'll go together okay? spend more time with each other, and i'll remember all the times we had. stay well! (this may not apply to BK and Arini, unless BK appealed out of the class)

so this is it. the day i've been waiting for.
tmr is monday. streaming result will be out tmr. omg.
i'm feeling scared. i may not be able to go to the class i wan, and ended up going to the sae class as some people. ohh my goodness...
i have cca tmr, and i can't sleep now. maybe i have to go myself. my knee joint is now in pain, that made made walking difficult. on off pain is worst. hais.
i just can't seem to cheer up. having to cheer up myself seemed more difficult than cheering my friends. i also dunno why...
what sotong said is quite right. what's there is alr there. i can't change anything yeaa? just hope for the best i think. can't do anything anymore.
--

today, morning went swimming. Uncle Johnny say i can go for silver test le. i was shocked. this meant i'm going for the second test... so fast. i only did my bronze test last june. xD
then home-d, tuitioned... after that did some hw..
went library and den sakae sushi. lots of problems there. lazy to type. {hahahas}
well, gtg. bye!

knee pain! ):
13days to Guzheng exam!

Labels: hais...

even if i try my best recovering from all this, i dun think i could just let it off. i think i would have a totally different character in the end as a result.
--

morning had tuition, and then continued with my theory work.
tuition did sec 3 maths, Matrices(?).
online-d and searched for my hw items. damn bored. its like trapped at home. i felt like going to the library. quiet and peaceful place. full of books though. xD

i really wish all this happenings, bad happenings, would stop, all together. it isn't sth good at all. i think, just think, i would go mad. all together.

tag replies.
Calli: yeaa, i know you. will link you soon.

Labels: i really wish i wouldn't change much.

well, saw this at Kaibin's blog. doing it out of boredom.

1. What do you want to be when you grow up?
- never even though of it =X .
2. Have you ever fallen in love?
- yeaa.
3. Do you like older guys/ girls ?
- =X
4. Who are the most important people to you?
- friends, gans & familys .
5. What/Who are you thinking of right now?
- thinking of what to answer.
6. What is your favourite colour?
- white. (:
7. Are you seriously in love?
- :P
8. Would you cry for the one you love?
- yeaa.
9. Have you ever failed in life?
- duhh.
10. What is your full name?
- Sim Jing Xun Claire.
11.Do you like your first name?
- Yupp.
12.How long have you liked the person you currently like?
- err, liking no one now? (:
13.Have you kissed anyone in the last 48 hours?
- nope.
14.Did you cry today?
- nope.
15.What are you doing this morning at 8am?
- preparing to go out.
16.What are you doing an hour ago?
- outside at giant.
17.What are you currently doing?
- listening to songs and doing this quiz .
18.Who last texted you a msg?
- Jin Soon.
19.Have you told anybody that you love them today?
- nope.
20.Do you miss anyone now?
- nope.
21.Any plans for tomorrow?
- tuition?
22.Is there anyone you want to be with now?
- :P
23.Name someone who make you smile today.
- idk worh, so many.
24.Name a friend whose name stats with 'Z'.
- Zena :D .
25.Which of your friend stays closest to you?
- dunno?
26.Do you prefer to call or to text?
- text .
27.Was yesterday better than today?
- yeaa.
28.Can you live a day without tv and your phone?
- tv yes, phone no. xD
29.Are you mad about anything now?
- yeaa
30.Do you ever think that relationships are really worth it?
- dunno..?
31.Last person you visited in a hospital?
- no one.
32.When is your last and second last hug?
- err, dunno? none?
34.How do you feel about your life now?
- it suck.
35.Do you hate anyone?
- nope.
36.Last person you called?
- Kaibin.
37.Who usually sent you the most texts in a month?
- dunno? not sure.
38.Is your room messy now?
- definitely xD.
39.What are you currently doing?
- watching youtube. ._.
40.Tag 10 people to do this survey.
- anybody :P

-- End of quiz--

bored... anyways, guzheng was okay, but morning, not.
keyboard was find, but speaking of Theory, i remember last week's joke.
Theory = Emaths.
to me larh. LOLx.
anyways, that's all for today. more on the previous post.

i'm not tolerating this cause i dun like this. you freaking dun understand you dun come anyhow find me to talk. you suck. plus, you think you are the best, but i'm telling you this. you aren't.
--

guzheng-ed. was damn pissed off. May didn't bring her guzheng nails and expects me to lend her. i didn't, and teacher came looking for me. she dragged yuhui too, like is her freaking problem? then i was pissed off. i almost shouted at her. she want us to pity her, like we would. wtf, she dun treat us with respect then why should we? do you like people to not treat you with respect? that time i write a "cannot meh" you oso angry then now wan us to treat a person who does not know what is should do and should not. you oso think that you very good, yarh arh, as if. take people's things without permission, taking food without permission, think you what? teacher so?

then home-d, ate and learn keyboard. leaving for classes soon. hope i survive for three lessons continously.

firstly, guzheng exam is 2 weeks later? think so.
secondly, tmr, my day shall suck.
thirdly, i hate myself.
--

just quite mad over things. things now a days are seriously... bad. i had an injured thumb for over practicing on the guzheng, its kidda bad. hais. blueblacks at the joint, pain when moving it.
argh, i kidda hate to do anything now.

ytd and the day before(?)... sth bad happened. i'm tired. i didn't ask to interfere with anything, but you got me involved. i dunno wth is happening... hais. i just... tired of what's around me now, and couldn't stop what i'm thinking myself. its tiring. i wouldn't say anything, but i rather trust whom i trust. stopping from doing that... i think is kidda difficult yeaa?

i oso dunno why, but i have a feeling tmr shall suck.
yes, i remembered i had guzheng in the morning, guzheng at 4pm, keyboard at 7 and theory at 8. whole day being packed up, no rest time. maybe i have, but, what's the point? rushing home and out again. home and out again. i'm tired okay... hais.

i think i suck. yes, my life suck. it totally sucked to the core. i freaking hate fridays.

Labels: why doesn't anyone give me some peace?

YAY! My first chinese knot project done! xD

Its a dragonfly okay? kidda difficult to make it! xD

tag replies.
Yuhui: LOL LOL LOL! YAY~ hahas, yeaa, see you tmr. xD

ytd's lesson was kidda okay.
then went to watch MJ's This Is It.
his songs were nice, but sad larh, some people dun like. xD
he's always courteous, talks nicely to his helpers, dancers, people working with him.
yeaa, enough of ytd's.

just done chinese knots, finished! xD

i freaking dunno what's happening, but at least give me a damn idea yeaa? wtf, i kidda dunno okay?!

home-d from sch, cca. ):
going Guzheng (again) later.

have an injured thumb. ):

Labels: hais

1 thing i must say.
to make me be angry with and not trust him anymore is no longer sth you can trick me to. i trust him more than i trust you. when he said he doesn't know why dun you trust him? pls, and that guy who called you has nth to do with us. you wan help we will help. but, when we get scolded for nth, den what's the point? pulling us and her? ask her to help you? i can stop her from doing it. think that you are the best, i dun think so. you dun respect people, we shan't respect you, or rather, no one will respect you. you wan people to give you freedom, but you dun give people freedom. dun learn someone okay. trying to make everyone believe your lies, not so easy anymore. i will be telling the truth, once all is settled. you wan me tell them all, what happened, can. dun make me do it. you won't like it. and... i know, i the only one who knew both sides of the story, but pls, dun make til i have to confront you.
--

currently at my granny's house. was kidda fed up just now. over sths. only some PEOPLE know.
hmm... i'm kidda tired of it.
waiting for my cousin to be home. his birthday ytd. xD just got the news that no guzheng today. wth. -.-" kidda pissed off too. only 1 hour to the class then say change to tmr. LOL... what to do? nvm lorh. shall stay here longer. xD but, kidda boring here. -.-"

tag replies.
kaibin: thx Kor! xD
jinsoon: thx. (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIGGIE BRO!! xD

i dun care anymore. i wan to be happy. that's all.
--

all hw are done, and i'm free. (:
but still kidda no mood. so yea.

having difficulties in my life.

hais.
what's done is done. i can't change it right?
i promise that i won't change much, but can i?
i just couldn't understand why, why does things gets it way, why does people wan to do what is wrong? why does people wan to take advantage of people's good? not saying that i am, but what's the reason of that?
--

today went for swimming.
trouble trouble. almost vomitted. was on empty stomache and is still down with flu.
hais, trouble, so i dun care.
then home-d for tuition.
going out later. shall blog more if i have the mood later.

Labels: lost in the maze...

MIA.

i'm going on MIA. won't blog much.

having to take this torture, i dun wan it anymore.
everything my fault, even it isn't.
i dun wan to listen anymore, cause you both won't understand nor would listen to what i say.
always thinking that you both are the best, always no fault.
i really regret okay. making people miserable is your best talent.

early morning woke up, eat den tuition...
after that went to Library, actually planned to go reservoir awhile, but then scared later kenna grounded...
so didn't go. came back and learnt Keyboard...
now back to com... later going to learn Guzheng..

Guzheng exam: 3 Weeks more, and is still having problems.

PLAYING HUNGARIAN DANCE NO.5 ON KEYBOARD IS TORTURE! hand very pain. T.T

you wan ignore or not, i dun care anymore. i won't say anything. i have no mood for anything.

i'm seriously very tired of everything around me. the thought of death is near me.

tag replies.
Lezhu: thx. (:
Jin Soon: hellos(: thx for tagging.
Grace: hellos... you wan public then public lorh. xD
Peixian: thx. (:

Labels: i have no mood to eat or sleep.

DOWN WITH FLU AGAIN! ):

hais, going to keyboard class soon, gonna see her soon. wtf.
dun feel like going. hais, but no choice. will post more when i'm back.

5467666: dun worry! eat medicine le, drank warm water and will bring jacket! i'm not emoing! (:

Kaibin: get well soon! (:
--

back from keyboard. kidda pissed off. wth, practice le still fail, then dun practice oso fail. i rather i dun practice le!
had theory, but i keep writing the beats into fractions! omg, i really EMaths madness le! hais. no choice larh. ): i going ki siao for maths le. =X after that went for dinner at Giant, and home-d.

tag replies.
yuhui: LMAO. xD

Labels: lost in a maze.

hais. lunar 19/9...
my ahh ma's death anniversary...
i miss her soo much...
i missed the times before she died when i'm p5...
its... terrible.. hais...

woke up early today, went to the temple... felt like crying when i see her pic... together with my ahh gong.. i was... totally.. going to break down...
put down the food... left it open... but my mind flew off...
it went back to the times when she hadn't pass away... hais...
wishing that she isn't in this world still... wishing that she had gone to heaven...
after that, threw the coins asking if she finished... this time i did the asking... knelt down... felt the pain at my knee.. i dunno what happen...

remembering the time... just before she passed away...
she fell down and was unable to walk anymore... she have to move around in her wheelchair... then because of illness? i forgot... she was again hospitalised... then, my parents and i were at the temple... i was 10 then... my father is chanting... my mother and her mother were in the temple hall... chanting too... and i was roaming around...
my ahhma's condition was... critical, and i'm at the temple... praying hard she was going to be okay... but... hais... shortly after everything my uncle called... saying ahhma smiled and... gone. i just can't take the news... hais...

hais... shan't say much. i have no mood anymore...

ahh ma, wish you are well in another world. always love you...

tag replies.
Natasha: LOLs! hi.
Singming: hellos. (:

i dun have the mood to post now a days... but still... i think post a bit bah.

3 days of guzheng... hais...
ytd the teacher very wuliao. i dun wan say. today also...
then went out of sch with Nat and Yuhui.. at first wanted to go buy fries... then in the end close.
in sch we were talking then got ask Elice larh... but then, scared like ytd... so, disagreed. and may is an freaking asshole. yts we know the truth le, then she was like impolitely," YOU KNOW MEH?" giving me the diao face. people know so what sia? think i'm dumb or what?
at the gate saw Aaron, ZH, XH, JS, and Donovan... then was like thinking... wth? nvm, i just said hi and turned away... then dunno who said "you see?" i was like... wth? say hi also you see... forget it larh.

totally in bad mood. no mood at all.

sry for not telling you. My fault.

tag replies.
Lezhu: hi(:
Stef: YO! (:
Aaron: thx for tagging. and i know why alr. its okay.

Labels: completely lost in a maze...